Monday, June 06, 2005

Subject: Breaking up is hard to do in person

E-mails have replaced many events in our lives. I miss the anticipation of letters from foreign places mailed with exotic stamps to collect, something to read, something for your grandchildren to find in a trunk years later. Face to face visits with your best friend, holding hands, hugging, just looking at each other and remembering your past together. Long phone calls filled with snorting laughter. Yes, e-mails are convenient, instant. Not always the most satisfying or best method of communication.

But there is one thing that an e-mail should not replace and that is the 'personal touch' of breaking it off with someone you have been dating and intimate with for 6 months. Dear-John-email is the absolute no-no. So if anyone out there is considering this, please reconsider and do your relationship with someone the courtesy of a face-to-face break up.
This happened to my most beautiful, smart, talented, hard-working, witty sister-in-law tonight. And frankly, I am still stunned at the shameful act of a 53-year-old successful business that from all I heard about him was ‘enlightened’. What kind of a cad would break up via e-mail? Am I just over reacting? Please advise.

(I guess I can just be thankful he didn't save himself some more time by cc-ing the previous girlfriend that he is getting 'back' with, tack on a cc to mutual friends so they know not to mention the 'unpleasantness'.)

9 comments:

Elaine said...

Oh my, that is lame. Not overreacting at all. Why, it's almost as bad as breaking up with someone on a Post-It (Do you watch Sex and the City?). Hope your SIL is doing ok.

Sandra said...

Believe me, your wonderful sister-in law deserves much better. Only a total cad and coward would do such a thing. I hope that your sis in law will soon be thanking her lucky stars because she's free of him and will meet Mr. Right after this!
You're right about e-mail too... nothing can replace face to face communication, a smile, and the sound of someone's voice.

Kim Carney said...

Thank you both. And I forgot about the Post-It! I guess there is worse delivery. I am going to send her the entire collection of Sex and the City. She has not watched it, I think she needs it now!

Liquid Sky Arts said...

What a coward!! She needs to forward it to all of his co-workers, and seek revenge. That's a terrible thing he did...

I really miss getting letters in the mail from faraway places. No one takes the time for that anymore.

jill said...

I hope she didn't reply... I agree, this is just about the most coward thing I've heard of. No one deserves this. But then again, he is the one who has to live with himself and at least now she knows just what she was dealing with. Coward indeed!

Kim Carney said...

She is a writer and has her own column. I told her she should write some freelance piece about this, and with the proceeds, go to France.

Erica Mulherin said...

I agree with everyone else. That was incredibly lame and she is probably better off without someone like that. Hope she is doing okay.

Balwearie said...

What goes around comes around. E-mail... hrumph! Your sister should write about it. That would be most brilliant. Good luck to her! With the proper spin, she may earn enough proceeds for a trip around the world!

Kim Carney said...

Balwearie: Yes, I was telling her the same thing. I am sure she is not the first, or last. It could be a great piece!