Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Antithesis

I guess I shouldn't have "woo hoo-d" so loudly the other day when I finished my project. I tried to validate it and came up with 50 errors. I have gotten that down to 14 errors since last night but I present it today in class after work. We are never too old to learn? Right?

Something occurred to me the other day when I was driving home. I am the antithesis to all of those blogs belonging to the perfectly coiffed, home-cooking, crocheting mom and wife. There are many of those out there, I see them and think, can those people be real? How do they do it? Of course, they are all attractive, even on the internet, beauty=popularity. And then they are usually talented and of course, they cook a wicked meal. Do they worked a full-time job? As Dee mentioned ... could they have their own hair dresser?

For me, I struggle to get up at 430a every morning. Drag myself to work and come up with good, creative ideas. Try not to work 10 hour days but usually fail at that. Rush home to think I might be creative - and that usually doesn't happen either. I don't cook. My mom makes all of those wonderful meals we eat. I occassionaly make a dessert, brownies from a box. I have given up wearing make-up and now you all know I have a bad hair day, every day. I hate all fashions of the day and would prefer to wear the same jeans day-in, day-out, than to be seen in anything I see in the Macy's catalog. I have never really been the organized mom and since I began working this early shift have gotten any worse at it. I am, in short, a terrible mom, except for the fact that I love my son to pieces. So, yes, I am the opposite of most of the blogs I use to read back when I had the time.

The Christmas trees have been standing in a dark living room, with no ornaments for a week. I was thinking this week was going to be my decorating, having fun for Christmas, creating Christmas cards. I am suppose to have a couple of days off but that might have happen since I have a big project at work that keeps changing. I did manage to stick some Narcissus in some bowls last. Right now I am thinking, Bah Humbug. ;)

8 comments:

Gini Lawson said...

Oh dear you are describing me, and so many of us that have multiple "jobs" and talents. I, too, have looked hard at those attractive women in their perfect "afternoon shopping" outfits, then looked down at my daily wear - paint splattered men's shirt, paint splattered stretch paints, clogs, no makeup, hair a mess, covered by a coat I've had for 10 years. I do clean up well, but I refuse to change into something more "presentable" when running errands after being in the studio all day. Who has time??? What's more, I have never ONCE heard my sons say, "Mom, you look a mess - can you please change into something more fashionable?"

Kim Carney said...

Thank you Gini! That makes me feel better!
Hey, and what are you doing with my clothes? ;)

Kim

katenelson said...

Sweetheart, your character is what matters. And yours is A-OK. Better than that. I'll always remember the day you said in response to someone else's small-minded criticism, "I know who I am." At the time, I didn't have a clue who I was and I thought, "I want to be like her someday." I still do. Love you!

S'mee said...

Forgive me Mother for I too, have sinned! I am, and have for *most* of my married life been a SAHM. I am the luckiest gal on the planet to have a guy who can scrape together enough funds for us to make ends run towards each other each week, and I try to budget and make them meet.

That said, when I did work outside the home I was a freaking wreck of a mother, I was the poster girl for "You Can't Have It All!" Everything suffered.

Even now, as the kids are out of the house and all I do is volunteer (granted a LOT!), I still have a wrecked house, lousy gray hair, no make up, wear guy shoes, and look like I am one step away from the shelters I work with! I'm a mess! I'm o.k. with being a mess though because it does give me time to help other folks on the side and to work in my "studio" from time to time.

The big difference is that NO ONE depends on me enough to pay me for my time, so the pressure isn't there. I work with people who are happy I can fog a mirror and show up with a happy face. When anyone has the pressure of being a bread winner, parent, and creative genius every freaking day, you gotta give 'em kudos for what they do well and forgive them for what they fall short in. Hair, make up, and comfy clothes? Who said those are flaws?

I love you and continue to read you (while I have left other blogs over the years) because you deliver every single time those "somethings" that enrich my day: great links, fabulous photos, personal glimpses into the life of a creative genius who is a real live person.

I gave up on Lady Clarol and Elle Magazine years ago, I only read what is important.

Maxinetoo said...

Ditto what everyone else said! And, btw ... have you seen me on the weekends!!! :) You are a wonderful mother, very talented lady and great friend. There are things far more important in life than looking like a fashion queen. I often look at women like that a wonder the same things you do, and knowing people like that, realize how uptight their families probably are because everything has to be perfect all the time. I love you just the way you are, for who you are, not what you look like!

jill said...

But... to me you are wonderful! I love that you're "keep'n it real," and aren't one of those "perfect, crocheting women!!

Oh, and you're a GREAT mom... who'd want one of those unartistic, flat, boring ladies anyway? You've got taste, style and best of all HUMOR and a heart the size of Texas!!

Hang in there and just know that what will get done will get done!!

Michelle (a.k.a. la vie en rose) said...

and this is exactly why i love you and why i feel like i relate to you more than i do a lot of other bloggers...because i am a lot like this too...so, so very much like this...and i often think and feel the same things...who are these women? are they real? and look at me compared to them...yikes!

unfortunately i don't have your wisdom yet...i haven't learned to stop trying to be like them...to be okay with myself as i am...

but one thing i will say about you...you are as much...if not more...of an artist than any of those women. i know you often don't have the time to invest in your art the way you'd like but when you do...girl, you blow me away... i don't know that i know anyone as talented as you... and i'm not just saying that because you're my friend and i love you. in fact it's because you're my friend that i can tell you how talented you are. if you weren't i'd be so jealous of you i'd hate you...heehee... instead i'm only somewhat jealous of you...heehee...

this wasn't meant to be a pep talk...i just wanted to tell you how much you inspire me...and how much i love you...and how when it comes to real life stuff i would call you in a heart beat...not any of those other "perfect" looking bloggers...

Kim Carney said...

dearest all ...
i tried to read these at work but got all teary-eyed! Thank you! for making me feel important, loved and okay with just who I am ;)
xoxoxo