Monday, April 11, 2005

Where Did My Cowboy Go?

My step-dad was a cowboy, he grew up bull-riding, breaking horses and drifted into training horses for a living. He came into my life when I was 12. It took some time for this city kid to adjust to having a 'John Wayne'-talkin', cigar-chewing, hat-wearing 'dad' but he turned out to be a good one for me. We flip-flopped between living a privileged life abroad in the oil field, and living a life of poverty training horses. I have wonderful memories of both. One memory - when a mare gave birth, (that was usually in the wee-wee hours of the morning) I assisted my dad to assure mother and foal were well. My dad would insist I stay home from school to watch this new life discover their new world. My teenage chores included cleaning horse stalls, cleaning water troughs, exercising horses, unloading hay and feed. (I laugh when my son whines over taking out trash). One of my favorite smells - dirt in an arena mixed with horse manure. And sometimes I forget it, but when I smell it again, I smile and think of my youth.
A long explanation of why I love this
Cowboy Online Exhibition by Adam Jahiel at Do Not Bend.

Also
The Gravures of Karl Blossfeldt is very nice.

My mom and step-dad on their wedding day. And that is how I remember them, before the bleak days of alcoholism, fights, divorce and finally suicide. I do miss my dad.

MomDadWedding

9 comments:

kath red said...

oh, that is so moving. You had me in tears. what a beautiful and sad story.

Amy said...

The cowboy photos are beautiful. I don't know that the subjects would care to be called beautiful, but the compostion of the pictures is stunning. Plus, I'm a fan of (real) cowboys, always have been even as a little girl. Thanks for sharing your memories too...they bring a different appreciation (aside from my own) to the photos. I think I'll go hug on my own cowboy now.

Nimbostratusdweller said...

Wow, I have never seen this pic. It is so sad, I 'm sorry for your sadness, So young here and full of dreams and joy! Life can be a real heart breaker.

Kim Carney said...

Thank you. Reflection into ones youth does bring a tinge of sadness but mostly I think we remember the happiness and joy, the people we love with that happiness in mind. - Kim

Anonymous said...

Oh wow, what a moving post. I'm so sorry for your loss. Such a bittersweet message today. hugs to you- www.rozzieland.blogs.com

Killjoy said...

Great post. Thanks for sharing - the pics are great, as is the one of your parents.

Enjoy your vacation.

"Maggie" said...

Your post reminds us to be ever greatful for all the daily blessings we have that we so often take for granted. I am so glad your memories are of their wedding day.
Thanks for sharing and God bless you Kim.

Anonymous said...

Kim, that is one of the best things you have written, you have a real talent not only for art but for writing (I know, it is also art). It is more than a story to me since I know the people. Very, very touching.

Ruth

bellablue said...

What a sweet, sad story. And what a beautiful old photo! It reminds me of my husband's family photos...