Tuesday, October 05, 2010

Late bloomer

D bought some Dahlias at the Flower Show but planted them late. They are blooming now!

late bloomers

late bloomers

I have been feeling a little down the last couple of days. Honing my resume into a sharp point that could be used as a weapon.

Trying to figure out who I am and what I want to be. I am getting a clearer idea of what I don't want to be doing 8 hours a day. You know, I am not a schmoozer, I find it difficult to sweet talk everyone I meet. Which I guess can come across as being anti-social. I really am a 'loner' and would prefer to work alone, in my own space, my own office, not crammed in an office with 30+ sitting 3 feet apart. I don't like going to endless meetings. I don't wear high heels and never will again. I really just am, who I am and I don't want to make excuses or apologize. I want a combination of working in my shop with tools and on my computer. Not always on the computer. I want to keep learning new tools and applications. For instance, I got an email about Barnes & Noble's PubIt! and can would love to convert my book. I am going to figure out how to do that. I love having a paint brush in my hand and have so many ideas for paintings. I have been working on assemblage art the last couple of days. And my other 'secret projects'.

I think I am between anger and depression in the five stages of grief. The post office is hiring temp jobs for the holidays, and D said, "you are postal already".

Stepped away from the computer the later part of the day. Cleaned up some in the yard for fall. Cutting back peonies, pulling weeds. There is so much to do back there, I hardly know where to begin. I really, really need to figure out how to prune the snowball viburnum that is growing out of control. It is a very large tree now with very thick trunk.

I ran into a couple of folks from my previous place of employment. And the awkwardness is exactly why I try to avoid those that aren't my best buddies there. There a couple of sentences about the weather, how you doing. Then an uncomfortable silence, then everyone needs to run off to meetings. Impersonal or just awkward?

When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping ... and D bought me a Band Saw today. I spent the rest of the afternoon cutting my little skulls and sanding them on the Belt Sander. Fun, Fun, fun! I should have about 30 made in a couple of days. More to come ;) Simply can't wait to have enough to sale, just to see what happens.

Have been watching lots of fun tutorials online. Trying to remember how to do things I did everyday many years ago and the reasons I love Adobe Illustrator so much. Also changed out my Twitter background again (with a Halloween feel) after reading Chris Kaufman's Effective Twitter Backgrounds: Examples and Current Practices. Will start using it more as a marketing tool adding my Etsy (nothing for sale for yet) address on there. So there you have it, my mind running amuck the last couple of days. ;)

And, I think I caught my son's cold. Fever and cough. Thank you, Honey Bunny!


LindaSonia said...

Kimmy - haven't been here in a while, but so sorry to read you are unemployed and it sounds like it wasn't by choice??

Hang in there, you've always come across on your blog as a real go-getter. I'm sure things you want will happen for you in due course.

All good thoughts coming your way. :)

P.S. the one photo you posted of your backyard looked really gorgeous. You guys must have an awesome climate.


Maxinetoo said...

I can so relate to your blog today ... I too am a loner and would much rather be doing all the things you want to do in my own little private space. D's postal comment was hilarious, but smack him anyway. :) Hugs to you!

Natalie Thiele said...

Sorry you're feeling miserable. The skulls project sounds interesting. They should sell like hotcakes on Etsy. Good luck!

amanda said...

You are one of the most talented people I have ever worked with. I have followed your work for years -- I visit your blog for inspiration. You have an artist's soul beyond temporary art. Artists are loners... because artists are creators. its a good thing. xxoo.


PS:: you have an artist's soul beyond temporary art.

Kim Carney said...

Hey Amanda:
That is so sweet and kind of you to say, on a day I had to the unemployment office to show off my "job application log" ... very depressing ;0 I am running over to see what you are up to on your blog ;) xoxoxo

Thank you LindaSonia, Gerrie, Natalie! Your good thoughts are received and truly appreciated!
Thank you all!

NKOTB4Eternity said...

Ooh, really love the yellow dahlia with pink highlights. Good luck with the job search. I'm unemployed myself, I know it's not easy. In the meantime, thank you for the beautiful pictures!

Kim Carney said...

NKOTB4Eternity ... Thank you! It has been an interesting year looking for work, for sure! Freelance keeps me a little busy ... and making Brantlers ... and for my mental wellness ... taking these flower photos. ;) Good Luck to you too!