I feel like I am floating in a time. I am telling myself to use this gift for reflection, rebirth and re-tuning. Discover what I should do with the rest of my life. Just trying not to float too far away from reality. OR am I flying closer to reality? I keep telling myself it has only been 11 weeks. And I feel like I am losing any skills or confidence I ever had, if I ever had them at all. But I think this is part of the process of losing your identity of being a 'worker bee'. I question myself, my future, my past choices these last couple of weeks. I think the big question is -- Who am I? Need to keep focused on my projects, my art, my quilts. Get up and go clean house! So to speak ;)
I am constantly taking online tutorials and signing up for online classes. This one I am really enjoying (although very behind), Practical CSS taught by Russ Weakley.
Yesterday the cable, hence, the Internet vanished. Leaving me sitting in front of dark computer screen and for a minute, I had no idea what to do. Looked at my reflection and said, this is a sign. Stepped away from job searches and tutorials and made my way to the studio where I stayed all day and most of the night. Cleaning and discovering art I had done in some previous life. Finding stuff I have done, drawn, written, scribbled and wonder ... what was that all about. Going through bits of paper, cards, images torn from magazines that sparked some thought. Threw many items in the trash yesterday. Giving myself the 'get organized' talk. Get organized so I can actually use my studio. Will be stepping away from the computer more from now on. Online classes and tutorials fine, but in limited time. I am making that promise to myself!