I think about my rituals every time I clean. Especially the bathroom. I have rituals and I have thought about talking about them here but never have. Maybe in this light of all the weirdness going on, I would like to make note of the little peculiarities of me. In case I am not around in a month or so. Yes, people my age are having these thoughts.
I love cleaning. I clean with toothbrushes, Q-tips and toothpicks. I always have. Even when I was a small kid, cleaning to perfection was "my thing". We lived in some pretty questionable places in my lifetime. Places that I did not want anyone to know I lived there when I was in Jr. High School. I would make sure no one would watch me going home (at this particular horrible duplex). I have also lived in some amazing places. That has been my life, sometimes the high life and other times, living in embarrassing ramshackles (in my view).
So back to my cleaning rituals. No matter where we lived, I will clean a room to perfection. Especially the bathroom. No matter how old, or decayed or wonderful ... they all get the same loving attention. We always had nice towels and the final touch would be to perfectly fold the towels and hang them like they would in a hotel.
I just did that again tonight in my bathroom. It makes me feel so complete to do that! Why? I have no idea. I always love to spray a special "cut grass" room spray but I don't think a dirty room deserves room spray OR flowers. No dirty room in my house will ever get flowers. It feels like an insult to the flowers.
I have bowls of my special rocks I have collected for years. Handmade bowls I found at the Goodwill. I wash and clean my rocks. I feel horrible if the rocks and shells have a coating of dust and hair. They deserve better.
I am pretty sure all of this has something to do with having control, especially as a kid. Having control of what my house looked like on the inside, no matter what it looked like on the outside.
Sunday, April 05, 2020
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